In ‘Are we Family?’, Troy encouraged black gay men to spend some quality time with friends. Never one to preach without practice, here’s what happened when he took his own advice. . .
Apart from my 579 closet friends on Facebook, Justin and Martin are the best friend’s I have. So, I decided to send them a text, inviting them over for a meal
We’d met each other on the first day of secondary school, and have been tight ever since. Being gay was never discussed. It wasn’t until Martin said that we weren’t ‘different’ to other boys we were just ‘special’ that the relationship was cemented. From then, until now, we have been inseparable, and made a commitment to living our lives being as ‘fierce’ as possible.
We’ve seen each other through the good the bad, and the ugly! And naturally we’ve had our ‘fall outs’ and ‘fall in’s’. We’ve bitched, fought and at times hated each other. The worst time was during the Ibiza holiday, when Justin and Martin had a vicious ‘knock down drag out’ fight over a guy who looked like Wesley Snipes. That was the lowest point but there have been many, many highs; when we’ve loved, shared, nurtured, promoted, and protected each other.
Justin was the first to reply to the text, and asked me not to cook anything for him because he was on a diet. Justin is, and has always been, as thin as a rake. He’s also been on a diet ever since I’ve known him. Martin’s reply was, what are you cooking? Martin, if you wanted to be cruel could be said to be fat! He says that he’s ‘big boned’ and only eats a lot because he has a fast metabolism. Martin, is the only person I know who never leaves his house without a jar of hand cream and his own hot pepper sauce in his bag.
They are like chalk and cheese. Justin votes Labour and Martin Conservative. Justin says Whip Me Houston was the greatest singer ever to which Martin would scoff, and say everyone knows the greatest singer ever is Mariah Scary! Justin is a dancer and very creative, Martin, on the other hand, teaches IT and is a complete computer geek. Justin is a massive football fan and supports Arsenal. While Martin makes an annual pilgrim to Wimbledon and worships the Williams sisters.
As crazy as they both are, they’ve always been there for me. Supporting me, at different times in my life, through redundancy, illness, homelessness, and bereavement. I want to invite my two crazy friends over so that we can bond, reconnect, and refresh our relationship. But more than anything I want to tell them I love them.